Now wait just a minute Jon. First of all, Merry Christmas.
Now then, let me holster my derringer and pull out my 16 inch gun borrowed from the USS Missouri.
OK, one time I was backing my bus into a parking place at my house and I just barely TOUCHED my hangar building rain gutter with the side of the coach. A little polishing compound later all evidence was removed from the coach. Less time than it takes to wipe up a bug smear on the front of the bus and no tools needed. The gutter was very easily bent back to correct shape with a pair of pliers.
Now then, wherefor and wheras, one time we were away on a bus trip, and Brian was needing to park his coach somewhere else because he was having his garage floor rechromed or full body massaged or something like that. So I offered, out of the goodness of my heart, to let him park his coach at my empty space for convenience.
When I returned, the truth became evident. He had rammed his coach into the same gutter and it was so far gone he had to hire the Gutter man to come replace it completely! A variety of neighbors will attest to this under oath or bribery I am sure. The fate of his coach you ask? I can’t say. Whenever Brian gets a bug splat on his vehicles he sells them and quickly gets another to hide the evidence.
The defense rests your honor.